Anyone who suffers from anxiety knows it is real and can be debilitating. The physical symptoms and constant restlessness leave one feeling breathless, distracted, nervous, scattered and exhausted. Over time we don’t even realise that we are anxious. The thoughts and feelings become habitual and conditioned. It is only when the mind and body become overloaded and stressed, that we are forced to stop and take note of what is happening within us.

I have suffered from anxiety on and off for many years and have had to learn ways to manage myself and my life to keep “Dear Ani” at ease. Ensuring I don’t take on too much or let myself get burnt out are essential skills I have needed to employ. I have learnt to have strong personal boundaries and manage my energy levels accordingly.

Anxiety can become a conditioned emotional state when we are stuck in our fight/flight/freeze mode (our Survival mode). Generally speaking, at the core, most people who suffer from anxiety have an extreme fear of safety. Now safety is a basic human need; however, with anxiety, this ‘need’ is distorted. Years of compounded stress lead us to become hypervigilant to our surroundings. Like a sea urchin forever sensing its environment, we constantly monitor our world to ensure we are safe. Over time this behaviour becomes conditioned and instead of striving for peace, happiness or freedom we constantly search for safety and security.

The key to self-management is Awareness. Without awareness, we will remain stuck on life’s treadmill without even noticing that there is another way of being. The following five behaviours reveal the mask of anxiety. With awareness, you can begin to stop conditioned thinking patterns and break the pattern of anxiety.  This process generates greater levels of empowerment as we begin to feel ‘in-control’ of ourselves, our emotions and life in general. We realise that in every situation we have a choice whereby we can choose worry or trust, safety or happiness.

These are the 5 faces of Anxiety:

1. Worry

By definition, anxiety is an excessive worry. With anxiety, ‘worry’ is the lens through which we see the world. We default into a negative ‘problems-based mindset’ instantly and can stay fixated in all the dangers and concerns a situation can bring. We are pessimistic, risk-averse and play small.  Worry is an energy drainer and a waste of time. With awareness, you can begin to recognise ‘worry fixation’ and re-direct your thinking towards a more solutions-focused and optimistic mindset.

2. Anticipation

Anxiety leads us to be in a constant state of anticipation. Anticipatory thoughts are fixated on the ‘what-ifs’.

What if I fail… what if they laugh… what if I can’t do it… what if I lose all my money…what if I am out on the streets…?

Blah, blah blah. This conversation is endless. The more we try to anticipate outcomes the more we project our focus and energy towards the future.

The antidote to anticipatory thinking is being in the now. Once you bring your focus to the present moment you can see what is in front of you right now. 

3. Prediction

One of the best ways to dis-empower anxiety is to know that it is a CONTROL FREAK. Because we feel constantly under threat the mind tries to control our environment by predicting what might happen.  We predict situations by creating expectations of how things need to be.

They need to support me… things must work out… I should be able to cope with everything … I have to succeed.

These are all examples of predicting and controlling your future.

Yes, we need to be prepared, but we also need to sometimes get out of the way and let life happen. By developing the muscle of trust, we can begin to let go of the reigns and be more present and in flow with life. (I will elaborate on this further in an upcoming post)

4. Rumination

Anxiety can ruminate or replay a past event. With extreme anxiety disorders such as PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), the mind is constantly focusing on the past and trying to protect us from experiencing pain and trauma again. Once you notice that you are fixating on the past and you accept (with compassion and courage) that the past is behind you and there is nothing we can do to change it, you can bring your awareness to the present moment. As with anticipation, being engaged in the present moment allows you to see what is really happening right here, right now and be open to opportunities in front of you.

5. Catastrophising

Dear ‘Ani’ is a DRAMA QUEEN. She really deserves an Oscar for her performances. She loves to dramatise and even catastrophise scenarios. With such focus, we become addicted to drama and chaos. The nervous system learns to function with an adrenalin and cortisol rush and therefore we can subconsciously create dramas in our life to stay stuck in an addictive cycle.

Being able to step away from the Drama and see the bigger picture of our situation helps to put things into perspective and manage them in a calmer and less dramatic way.

Can you notice any of these thinking patterns?

Once you recognise that your thoughts belong to ‘Ani’ STOP, take a step back and begin to reflect on your thoughts and feelings. As you begin to redirect your thoughts towards a more positive outlook, you will begin to notice a greater sense of calm. Every time you reframe and readjust your thinking, you break the neurological cycle of anxiety. It will feel hard in the beginning to break the patterns and the habits, but keep going … your happiness and freedom depend on it.

To help ease your anxiety, you may also like to check out My Fast Anxiety Fix Guided Meditation. Click here or search for Peace in My Pocket Meditation Podcast on Apple iTunes.